It's a talent. Like any talent, with out practice you loose your ability. Or maybe it would be better to call it this type of talk “chit chat.” I have recently lost my ability to chit chat. You know you meet a new person and you try to chit chat for a bit. Get to know them a little. Or then there is chit chat with an old acquaintance or even someone you may at one point called “friend.” Chit chatting can be a very important skill to have. Part of it is having questions to ask and knowing the right responses and follow up questions.
Part of my problem, I think, maybe I have just been reintroduced to a culture I haven’t really had to interact with for 4 years; the culture of the real world. I am just caught off gaurd.
Me: Oloka how have you been? I haven’t seen you since girl’s camp.
Oloka: oh pretty good, just taking care of my daughter. She is over there.
Me: oh great! I think I’ll go to sacrament now.
-- I was totally caught off guard--
Conversation at home:
Me: hi Alex! How is your play going?
My Brother: (silence as he walks right past me and goes into his room)
-- oh I forgot you are in your resentful 20’s period, try not to take that roll so far next time…. Geeze actors--
Part of my other problem is I have nothing to say:
Holly: How are you?
Me: fine thanks.
Holly: what are you up to back here in El Segundo?
Holly: oh nothing? Not home for the summer to work? Or anything?
Part of my problem is I don’t care:
Holly: well me and (old friend) and (old friend) are going to Sharkiez bar tonight if you want to come.
Me: thanks, but I should probably stay home tonight.
Holly: oh you should come (old friend) just turned 21 and we are going to party. Her new BF is going to be there and so is (old friend).
Me: yeah no thanks
--I really don’t care to talk about the El Segundo gossip while everyone gets smashed. I really just don’t care about what you have to say. Especially where you will want to say it.—
Cases of being caught off guard, having nothing to say, and not caring make for really uninteresting chit chat.